Every year, around this time, a remarkable thing happens: creatures gather in large hoardes, moving slowly and picking their way through the obstacles dotting the modern countryside. They stop and graze, lining up for normally interminable waits for access to scare resources. Many have blank expressions on their faces and some confer quitely in low, guttoral tones. Others bring obnoxious young.
I hit the mall this afternoon and discovered this concentration camp of capital. I naturally gravitated towards the cheapest AND least expensive stuff being offered: all the merchandise at the dollar store. If you're someone who is on the receiving end of one of these $.99 + $.01 gifts, I apologize in advance. It will be quite obvious if you are.
It was more than a last-minute shopping trip, though, it was also a test to see if I could tolerate the unfortunate excesses of the modern Christmas shopping experience without getting short of breath. I actually did just fine for myself, and for not passing out and being trampled by the rampaging procrastinators, I congratulate myself.
In other bovine-related metaphors thanks to MooCow for pointing out , in an entry far below, an unfortunately-titled article called "Calculus of Coitus" . It's an interview with an author of a book about mathematics and relationships. Now, having just finished an insane course in calculus-based statistics, this sort of thing should be of interest to me, right?
It is a profoundly bad idea.
Yes, yes, I know mathematical models are the wind beneath of the wings of modern systems everywhere.. but.. to me it's kind of morbid. Akin to modeling the manner and date of your death. How would you like to know that there's a 99.5+/-.2% probability you will be killed by a vole chewing through a rusty gas pipeline on March 14, 2035? According to the article, some statistical distribution says that you're going to have to have relationships with 12 people in order to have a 75% chance of marrying someone you will stay with.
It doesn't say what the odds are when you've only had 0 relationships. I could do the math myself but I suspect that I won't like the answer.
Posted by eric at December 19, 2004 10:02 PM